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Submit a Question

Bad Friend

2/2/2022

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What's your question?
I feel like I am a bad friend, and I'm not sure if I am or I'm just overthinking it. I am extremely introverted and quiet. So, when I'm with my friends I don't say as much as they do. It normally works out when we are in a group, but one-on-one it's a little awkward. I have a friend who I have a lot of classes with, so we talk between them. But sometimes there's nothing to talk about so we just walk in silence. I've heard my friend talk about feeling ignored and to not make jokes about the other person when discussing being a good friend in class. I can't tell if it's about me. How do I fix that? I just don't like talking a lot. And when I do talk, I make jokes that I worried have hurt their feelings. I always make sure I say "I'm joking" or "I'm kidding." They laugh too, but I feel bad. I've stopped making jokes like that, but how do you say sorry about something if you don't even know that it hurt them? I've thought about talking to them, but that was the problem in the first place. Am I being irrational or do I need to be a better friend? If so how do I be a better friend?

Mr. Bobcat:
Dear Bad Friend,
​
First of all, you aren't some kind of terrible person if one person doesn't like you. In this case, though, we can't really know that they don't like you. Communication really is the key here. I would recommend that you talk to your friends. Be honest. Let them know how you're feeling. It's possible that this is all just a misunderstanding. Good luck! 
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