Steak Man

What's your question?
I have been having a lot of self doubt. Some of my friends constantly call me fat. A few people say I'm ugly. Now don't tell me not to worry what other people think. Cause that defeats the whole purpose of trying to get a girl friend. I've done things to try to look better. But even still I'm being body shamed. Even my cousin, whose family has called me fat, and one constantly calls me ugly. I don't feel like I look fat. I don't think I look the best, so I don't know what to do.

Mr. Bobcat:
Dear Steak Man,
I'm sorry you are experiencing this. It has to be overwhelming to keep hearing negative commentary about the way you look. This is a difficult question, because it involves so many other people that are making poor choices. The bottom line is this: you can only control yourself, not them. It's a basic human instinct to want to be loved and to belong. When we don't feel that, it hurts. My advice is to focus on yourself since you can control that. I'm not saying to just ignore them--that's not possible. I'm saying you need to get to the heart of how you feel about yourself. It doesn't matter what you look like, you're amazing. I mean that. You have to get real with yourself and recognize that others can't hurt you if you truly believe that you are perfect the way you are. Focus on positive comments in your head. When you turn to the negative, recognize it and change it to positive instead. A change in mindset could help you to overcome all the petty haters.